Sunday 3 June 2012

Mouth works before brain

I have had this awful problem ever since i was a child and i'm sure i can't be alone?  My mouth often works a tad bit faster than my brain.

I will rewind over twenty odd years to me sitting in a classroom in Milton Keynes, *Big wave to Conniburrow school*  we were having a sex education lesson. I must of been about eight. Seems a bit early looking back on it now but i can't of been much older. Anyway enough waffle. The teacher drew on the blackboard male and female parts *snigger* Sadly we didn't have anything as flash as a whiteboard in those days. Our teacher asked as to name the parts that she pointed to, i am pretty sure that someone put there hand up and mentioned the word "penis" cue sniggers from every child in the class and then i remember thrusting my hand in the air like the eager child i was and said "i know miss, i know what the other one is, it's a virginia miss" Well as it came out of my mouth and the laughs started i just knew i had made a major boo boo. To this day i struggle to ask for Golden Virginia when shopping for my partner. You see, i got it wrong once,so  i could easily end up asking for a golden vagina on the next shopping trip.

Along the same lines, today i learnt what is not acceptable to say in busy a supermarket. "I fancy a joint on Monday"